Last Post on Perspectives

and i'll have to move on with my life.

a big thank you to those who have supported the show in one way or another:

my mummy who got nicole and i our costumes-- we each have two sets of those pants, though we only wore one for all the five nights; weishen and daniel who consistently helped me book bowett room for practice; jinyang and ryan who cooked dinner throughout the holidays for nicole and i before our rehearsals; jinyang and ryan who had to walk me back from queens' after my night rehearsals; and all the people who came to watch the show-- yaoyu, huixin, joe, mabel, shu-en, shuangning, kelvin, haihan, kimberle, jasmin, weevien, alex, ben koh, eugene, ee mae, darryl, sean, angel, kathy, livia, kaier, and people whom i didn't meet backstage but was among the audience

THANK YOU VERY VERY MUCH =)

small fight, BIG BIG LOVE

the last show didn't end with a bang-- nicole and i slipped at the very beginning (though no one noticed except kaier), and the bow was too short for sentiments to build up. but that didn't mar the whole experience! nicole and i had given our bestest best, and i am almost sure that all her glycogen reserves in her right arm must have been exhausted from me leaning on her and she swinging me around, hah!


the piece we shared 'small fight big love', or as we more fondly knew it as duelling banjos, was well-received all five nights. the very first time we presented it to the cambridge population at the wip, we were the only item that received an applause, and i just loved how the audience went 'aaawwwwww' at the end when nicole and i came back together into the hug =) and weren't we flattered when netta, a brilliant choregrapher herself, came up to us in the dressing room and said. 'are you in kai's piece? that is my favourite!' yesterday, she added that kai's piece has 'all the elements that i think a good piece should have', hehe!


most of the credit for the success of' *ahem* our piece (please forgive this shameless pride that is overflowing in me) goes to kaier, whose style in dance really played to our strength. we weren't the best dancers around; in fact we were far from the standards of the many. but we stood out because the piece was fresh, ingenious, 'clever' (from anthony leung), which led it to distingush itself from the pieces with 'pointy toes'. quoting VARSITY:

'Special mention also ought to go to the charming playfulness of Kai Eng's Small Fight Big Love' all the more ingenious for having been choreographed from Sweden...'

- Varsity Issue 669

=DD brlliant! just that it wasn't from sweden but singapore! from the astar studio in biopolis! it was that fateful day that nicole and were bored and went to the studio after work to try out some steps when this girl with five colours in her hair and a nose ring invaded the studio. she was practising her own steps and after watching a while, nicole and i thought 'she is GOOD!' then somehow we found out that she was from camb and from CUCDW! soon enough, we were having 7am rehearsals, many many brusies on our backs, and many many inspirations for creativity in dancing and DRESSING! heh!


we soon left singapore but practice for duelling banjos continued in the frosty mornings in benson hall, through the dark winter nights in magdalene squah court, buckingham, and the glorious queens' bowett. and finally finally, it was wrapped up with compliments and applause at the adc =)=)

at ballet under the stars with nicole, my trustworthy and dependable dance partner, whom i can flung myself onto knowing that she'll catch me. thank you for being there to colour the dance experience in camb =)

my favourite comment on our dance:

'a faded photograph of childhood memories is what we looked like'

- Nicole Tay, adapted from Yao Yu, who was one of our earliest audience at the show

one more hour to the last show. as much as i dreaded it this morning, i am starting to miss it already.

i will miss how i was always so kancheong in the dressing room that i keep dropping things and nicole had to shout 'stop being so kancheong!' .

how i keep complaining that nicole should re-do her blusher, because either the intensity wasn't strong enough or the area powdered wasn't large enough.

how we fix the star ribbon on each other's hair, making sure the knots were as tight as they can be.

how i start panicking when the belly dancers were called onto stage despite we were 2 items behind them.

how nicole and i started some weird sumo steps at the side of the wings to 'rugged up' the energy.


how nicole just had to the me the things to watch out for JUST BEFORE WE HAD TO GO ONTO the stage when she had all the time in the dressing room.

how we gave each other re-assuring hugs while we waited for the spotlight.

how we gave each other the BIGGEST and TIGHTEST hug at the end of the piece, amidst the applause from the audience.

how i had to quick change in the wings and nicole helped me with my scarf.

how nicole had to exclaim how good the guy in the beatbox piece was, and how sinead's parts of a psalm was her favourite every night (nicole has 3 favourites: the psalm, angel gabriel and when push comes to shove).

how nicole just had to exclaim that jennifer hersch is amazing every time she walked past her.


and how pleased we feel when people tell us that our piece was their favourite backstage =)



there will be no more 7 am rehearsals, or 8am rehearsals for duelling banjos. no more fretting that we have lousy stamina, or that the squash court was just too cold for living things to dance in it.

life would be back to it's routine self, or at least more like it's routine self after the bow tonight.


'Small Fight BIG LOVE!' -- an amazing creation by Kai Eng; an amazing dream for Nicole Tay and Meisheng Lau

Scientist by Day, Dancer by Night

is this possible?

i thought when i have learnt to be 'mindful' of what i am doing, such that i can compartmentalise my focus and energy, i can do all i want.

but the relationship between the quality of my essays and the time spent mulling over them is all too clear--or is it me blowing things out of proportion again?

please don't tell me that i am a student and my primary priority should be academic; i think it's a student's prerogative to sail the uncharted waters, to travel the roads less travelled, lest how would she know her path is not merely the trace of somebody else's?

i only take up commitments that i know i can give my best to see them to their completion. it is the best or nothing, the all-or-none principle.

Jittery, jittery!

an hour more till the curtains are raised...

WE --CAN-- DO-- IT!

P E R S P E C T I V ES

i really should be studying for collections tomorrow, but my mind wouldn't keep still! aaaaaaaargh.

all that is racing in my head now are the tech runs, the rehearsals the rehearsals the rehearsals the rehearsals the rehearsals!!! i am in this full dance-y mode when term is about to start, when i am suppposed to think about organelles and essays and practicals! and the collections, the collections tomorrow and on sunday.

i am really excited about Perspectives-- i don't recall such great anticipation for Elemental last year. maybe it's because the items that i am in this year have more personal touch to them. one demands emotional protrayal, the other sees the development of trust and friendship with another person. and have i mentioned that kaier, the choreographer of the dance that nicole and i are sharing, will be flying in from stockholm to watch the show?!

the show this year has an interesting concept-- it's about expression of experiences and memories (see below), so it indeed can be rather personal for all those involved. but the production team this year seems, erm, to be facing quite a lot of hiccups along the way. no posters, no postcards or any form of publicity has been seen around camb yet, when the show is less than a week away. hopefully the show will turn out fine. last year's was a sell-out, so this year's will have high standards to beat.

then again, i am always surprised by how well people here can work in the very last minute.

anyway, here's my little part in publicising the show; it will be great if you can come and support =)

Presenting to you the annual CUCDW production:

PERSPECTIVES

"In memory everything seems to happen to music" - Tennessee Williams

Do your memories define you and your experiences? How much can you trust what you remember? How do the past, present and future linktogether?

Perspectives is an exploration and expression of the themes of time and memory through contemporary dance, defining them in a beautiful and engaging sensory spectacle. Drawn into each Perspective, the audience will be woven into the fabric of time with each inspiring movement of electric live dance. From the timeless aesthetic of classical ballet to the current pulsing beat of Hip-hop, Perspectives is a dynamic production gripping the audience in the powerful rhythm of its performance and vibrant intensity of its memory.

Let us transport you to a different time and place where you can embrace the contemporary heat of Cambridge dance glimpsing into the future and forming memories that will last a life time.

Date/time: 22-26 Jan 08, 7:45 pm each night.

Location: ADC Theatre

Cost: Tues-Thurs £8/6, Fri & Sat £9/7

(the concession rates are for students)

Tickets available at www.adctheatre.com

right. excitement sublimated into words. back to mugging.

Springboard -Day 1

'Springboard is an initiative aimed at encouraging young women to realise their full potential, by increasing their self-confidence and belief in their own capabilities.'

a programme reminiscence of ACP, except that i am now the participant.

the theme and topics to be discussed over the course of the programme will be familiar- the universal rules of being proactive, taking charge of your own life, knowing your strengths and weaknesses, chart your values and goals, time management, energy management...almost all of the aspects that we once tried to instil in our young participants.

still, i am glad that i have signed up for this.

today, it provided the platform for me to re-assess my values and my goals, something i have put away for long enough in all my hurry to read and write those essays. i have always told people that camb is a wonderful place to be in because of the sheer opportunities it has to offer. but i have kept quiet about how this very fact has also caused much stress. there is always the dilemma between wanting to maintain the status quo, to do and improve on what you are good at and should be doing, and the guilt of not making full use of the opportunities available, the anxiety of missing out. but perhaps the real source of stress is not from the dilemma itself. rather, it could be the desire to live up to the expectations of others. i thought that was thought-provoking!

i also like the setting provided for free discussion among all the participants. when people share their experience, you get reminded of even the most sucessful looking people have setbacks, and that their anxieties and stress are really not very much different from your own. in some cases, you can even consider yourself to be fortunate relative to others. i am not suggesting that we need to know that other people have it tougher than we do to feel reassured; instead, i think it is a reminder for not sinking into self-pity when things are not smooth-sailing. in addition, such people with such stories could be potentially be good role models for inspiration and motivation.

also emphasized strongly today were the importance of seeking support, the necessity to build networks for support and the value of support systems already available. this, too, i find is quite a refreshing idea. the much mentioned figures to seek for advice are the personal tutor, the director of studies and the college nurse- i have only met my personal tutor once, and have never seen the college nurse. and i think my dos could be fed up with me by now because i keep sending him emails for a recommendation letter. the facilitators, however, reassured me that these people are more than willing to help students, and that nothing troubles them more than not knowing that a student is suffering in silence. hmm...since they say so, no harm trying really. isn't this form of personal attention the collegiate system is supposed to offer begin with? okay, i will try to have more confidence in this sort of organised pastoral care system.

so, i have not many terms left in camb, and the next is starting in a week's time. a very apt time indeed to have new advice on how to live the next term effectively.

Me a Hunter?

You Are a Hunter Soul

You are driven and ambitious - totally self motivated to succeed Actively working to achieve what you want, you are skillful in many areas. You are a natural predator with strong instincts ... and more than a little demanding. You are creative, energetic, and an extremely powerful force. An outdoors person, you like animals and relate to them better than people. You tend to have an explosive personality, but also a good sense of humor. People sometimes see you as arrogant or a know it all. You tend to be a bit of a loner, though you hate to be alone. Souls you are most compatible with: Seeker Soul and Peacemaker Soul

or is it a personality that i subconciously adore?

either way it is a bit strange, especially the part on relating better to animals than to people. anyway, such tests are good for amusement. and perhaps a bit for reflection. just a bit.

2008

the new year has twas arrived.
it has to come, regardless of whether i am ready for it or not.

in this new year may i find renewed strength in Him, and that i trust Him more with my burdens and queries.

"But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in him.
He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit."

Jeremiah 17: 7-8

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to my two dear brothers,

may you both start wonderful new life chapters in this new year.new environments bring new companions, new responsibilties and new ways to glorify our Lord.

with love always,

sis